I have never been good at asking for help. So last week when people kept asking what they could do to help, I didn’t know how to answer. I knew deep down I couldn’t do this alone, but I had no idea how to even know what to ask for. That’s when people just started showing up. And what happened next was an outpouring of love and support I never saw coming, that was so strong it literally sustained me for the three days I spent unraveling my Dayton life.

With Paul away, and the house selling so quickly and somewhat unexpectedly, to say there was a lot to do is an understatement. There were things to sort, things to pack, things to sell, things to donate, contractors to meet, a garage to clean out, a U-Haul to pack, a storage unit to reserve, and somewhere in there I was supposed to remember to eat and be able to rest my brain enough to sleep a little each night, even though I was reeling with a seemingly endless to-do list. So I did what I always do, and I just started moving. And to say I couldn’t have done it without the amazing people in my life is the understatement of the year. For them, and for the myriad ways in which they stepped up for me, I am eternally grateful and humbled to see such kindness.

To Jen, for bringing me dinner while I was tearing apart my kitchen, for helping me take things off the walls, for bringing me boxes and refusing to let me sit still because she knew if I did I might not get back up. Thanks for keeping me going.

To Dick across the street, for installing new smoke detectors in a pinch so I could finally pass my Kettering inspection, for offering to take all my random lawn chemicals and bottles of who-knows-what off my hands to dispose of during the next hazardous waste pickup, and for being the watchdog over my house as an endless stream of people were coming and going while I was in NC. You are a champion and the best neighbor there ever was.

To Forrest, for loading up not just the furniture you came for, but also my huge pile of “dump stuff” including a random cat box and 4 used Toyota rims, and taking them to various places to offload them. Thank you for being so generous, and no, it’s not the only reason Jen keeps you around. 😉

To Mark, for offering your garage as storage, for sticking around to finish the bourbon and have a heart-to-heart, for letting me convince you to take that awesome couch (you’ll thank me, I know you will) and for being such a good friend. I’m gonna miss you, buddy.

To my best peeps who showed up for my “Oh My God, We’re Having a Fire…Sale,” for taking SO MUCH STUFF off my hands (and off my literal plate), and for toasting the good times over shots of Fireball. It was fun to see what things people gravitated toward and took with them (Andy with the German stein and the Galliano for Sunday brunches; Mark with the antique box we discovered was for writing and the used Jeep stereo)… it makes me smile to think that little pieces of my life in Dayton are now sprinkled around all of your homes. I will miss you guys more than you know, and will hunt you down if you don’t come visit me. Don’t forget I know where you all live.

To Danielle, for bringing me my favorite grape and blue cheese salad, along with a whole random ass bunch of other stuff from DLM because you can just never get the one thing you went there for. For continuing to take my furniture even though Charlie has tried to disown you at least twice for it, for bringing your kids over to give me hugs and run through my almost empty house, for helping take apart the shelf from hell, and for just sitting with me on the porch rug after everything was done. I love our friendship and have to keep reminding myself that even when we don’t talk for days or weeks, we pick up right where we left off.

To Angie, for the numerous phone calls about the nitty gritty of the house deal, for talking me down from the ledge a couple of times, and for checking in regularly even though you’re all the way up in New York. Your calls and texts had a calming affect on me when I needed it most. Thank you for being there, even when you couldn’t be there.

To Shelby, Scott, and everyone else for the hugs I needed so badly. You two in particular give the very best hugs; they truly make me feel seen and loved.

To Mike and Kamela, the realtor team that slays. You guys are the best there is, the gold standard. Kamela, you went above and beyond the call of duty so many times. You went to bat for me with contractors, even when I said to one of them over the phone, “I’m seriously losing my shit right now” which was both true and a little out of character for me. But you stayed steady, you stayed kind, and you were my hero through this entire ordeal. You even took an entire dining room’s worth of stuff to Goodwill for me, saving me yet another trip I didn’t want to have to make. Thanks for keeping me in line, keeping me calm, and for honestly loving that little succulent photograph you saved from the Goodwill pile.

To Joseph, the kind fellow tenant at the U-Storage place who came to my rescue when I was stretched about to my breaking point with a loaded U-Haul and two moving guys I was paying hourly…When I couldn’t figure out how to get inside and there was clearly no one working there, you patiently and gently told me it was going to be OK, and even when I started to stress cry you calmly walked me through everything one step at a time. Thank you for being there, for showing me how to find the access code, where to use it on various keypads, and for simply being a good human. The world needs more kind strangers, and the universe put you there when I needed one.

To everyone who has checked in on me repeatedly, especially my amazing in-laws, through texts, calls, and polos. You have all been my lifeline the past couple of weeks since Paul left, and instead of leaving Oakwood feeling like I had a hole in my heart where my old life used to be, I drove out of town on a rainy Friday morning with an incredibly full heart. I love you guys.