I know it’s not Christmas, but I wanted to share this recipe anyway. Probably because I’m hungry and this is the mother of all hunger cures. Every Christmas, the way we celebrate the holidays with my dad and stepmom is by making a giant pretzel feast. I don’t remember exactly how long ago we started this tradition, or why, but none of us have ever looked back. We don’t exchange gifts, we just eat pretzels. LOTS of pretzels. And typically sip on (several glasses of) eggnog while we’re at it. I’m not talking about those little hard, dry pretzels that are a sad excuse for a snack– I’m talking about huge, soft, salty, buttery, fresh from the oven baked pretzels, courtesy of a family recipe older than I am.
If you’re thinking, “Pretzels are not a meal,” I have two comments for you: 1) You are wrong. 2) That’s what everyone thinks, until or unless they’re lucky enough to experience Pretzel Feast for themselves. See, it’s not just the pretzels that are the source of the joy– sure, they’re the MAIN source, but what makes this type of meal so fantastic is that we pair the pretzels with all kinds of other delicious things. And before you ask, yes, I’m going to give you the pretzel recipe, but we’re not there yet.
First, and most importantly, let’s talk about the cheeses:
Alouette Garlic & Herbs, Schuler’s Bar Cheese, and Merkts Almond Swiss are the three staples you’re going to want to have, but sometimes I like to pick up an additional random soft cheese from our local grocer’s deli, just to spice things up from year to year. We personally like the above-named trifecta because each has a unique flavor profile so there is a little something for everyone, plus they complement each other well. I’m partial to the Alouette and Schuler’s, while my dad’s favorite by far is the Almond Swiss (which can be hard to find, so I always start looking for it earlier than I need to). Typically, I fail miserably at finding it, but my stepmom saves the day by magically bringing some.
In addition to the spreadable cheeses, we also cut up blocks of cheese for even more variety, and basically for something else to chew. Pick a few you love and don’t overthink it. Literally, any blocks of cheese will do. I’m a big fan of Gouda, Sharp Cheddar, and Swiss, but you can seriously just raid the cheese department and go nuts. Speaking of nuts…
We also have nuts:
Nothing says “holiday gathering” like little bowls of mixed nuts sitting around. If I’m feeling ambitious, I’ll make a somewhat bootleg version of Joe Biden’s Nuts (I also add rosemary and dried cranberries after it’s cooled, and this combination is so addicting we somewhat inappropriately refer to them as Crack Nuts). But usually I just grab a big can of Planter’s mixed nuts and call it a day. Nuts + pretzels = delicious. And again– something else to chomp on.
Where’s the protein?
Yep, I was getting to that. In recent years, we have started adding shrimp cocktail to round out the menu, mostly because we felt the need for some protein but also because they’re delicious to snack on while prepping the rest of the meal (the pretzels involve a few steps; don’t panic, they’re easy).
Last, and only to avoid savory overload, we also make a simple chocolate peanut butter fondue, and serve it with assorted chunks of fruit and angel cake. And that, my friends, is why we call it Pretzel Feast. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and don’t forget the eggnog!
P.S. This recipe is a family treasure, consider yourselves lucky. 😉
Soft Pretzels:
- Measure 2 cups warm water into a bowl. Add 2 packages bread yeast, stir to dissolve.
- Add 1/2 cup sugar, 2 teaspoons salt, 1/4 cup melted butter, 1 egg, and 3 cups of flour. Beat until smooth.
- Add rest of flour (3 1/2-4 cups), combine with (clean) hands if necessary.
- Cover and refrigerate 2 hours.
- Remove dough from fridge, separate into small pieces (usually makes about 20-24 pretzels). Put a little flour on your hands and roll each piece vigorously between your hands until the dough is long and skinny like a snake. Fold into pretzel shape by making a U and then crossing the ends back down to make an X. Place on greased cookie sheet or use parchment paper.
- Mix together in small ramekin 1 egg yolk and 1 tablespoon water. Brush a little of the mixture over each pretzel, then sprinkle with kosher salt. Cover pretzels with tea towels and let rise 30 minutes.
- Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes.
- Feast.
